All This Waste of Life

24 years in this earth and yet I feel so old. I don’t feel like I’m 24- being as tired and hopeless as I am now, I feel a little younger than a dinosaur. Some people say they don’t regret anything that happened to them, I, on the other hand, regret so many that looking back at my life makes my shoulders ache and my heart cringe.

At 7, I wanted to be an author of a really important book. I wanted to write something that everyone will read and enjoy like a really juicy secret. I wanted to expose all the secrets in the world so no one could lie and everything will be out in the open.

At 8, I wanted to be a maid. I did not want to go to school and just enjoyed staying at home. The only person I knew who could do that without being nagged was the maid. Thus, I wanted to have the ticket that she did to stay at home and not be obligated to go to places and learn things I didn’t need.

At 9, I wanted to be a scientist. My tita was a biologist, a self-proclaimed scientist and she went to so many exotic places and brought home live crabs from dagupan that she hung on her double deck bed with pride.

At 10, I lost interest to be anything productive in society. I was so focused on making my mother and step-dad break-up that I let a few years of my childhood pass me by without a fight.

Today, I look back and realize all the opportunities I wasted and everything I will be wasting in the future if I do not find my firm footing in this crazy race. At 24, I still do not know what to do with myself. I fear that I will enter my mid-life crisis still with an identity crisis. How pathetic.

I can just imagine how many in my generation feel the same way. I feel sorry for all that life wasted.

A shameful tourist in my own country

Went to Boracay last month. Stayed there for 4 days. I was a Boracay virgin. My first time. It was an eye-opener- the social situation, I mean. And I will get to that later.

Right after shift, I went to Shopwise to buy a new 2 piece. They had NO sizes. Imagine a 2-piece being a one-size-fits-all. I had to give away the bottom since there was no way that it would cover my ass. Kept the top though.

I was happy.

Cebu Pacific was OK. I got the window seat and they do not serve food but I have no complains because my full pack stayed with me in the cabin. I would hate to check-in my stuff. You feel more secure with everything just within arm’s reach.

We stayed in Orchids Resort. The overall experience was OK. They overlook small things like the request for 2 single beds but they make adjustments and everyone ends up happy. Their free breakfast is worth mentioning. Specially their fried potatoes with bacon. I miss it already. Their place was so homey. You could walk into the kitchen anytime and ask your eggs to be cooked in the exact way. The place was very Filipino- wooden planks for the floors, sawali for the walls, bamboo beds, tye-died sarong for curtains.

As you all know, I love food. So the things worth mentioning is related to this.

ARIA- We had dinner at Aria. Their all-cheese pizza was wonderful. It was cooked in wood.

JONY’S- You cannot leave the beach without trying Jony’s shakes. The Banana Choco Peanut was good. Nakaka-lula though. It was so big you can trip and your face would fit in the mouth of the glass.

TRUE FOOD- The indian restaurant True Food is worth mentioning. Their servings are big (when the waiter says good for 2, assume it is double that). Skip rice and order the bread instead to experience real Indian stuff. Try the curry and their chicken.

Ignore the burger joint in D Mall. They serve bad fries and unimpressive burgers.

We rented mountian bikes to have a tour of the island. The rate is 100/hour but you can haggle if you want to rent it the whole day.

We went to Diniwid (where the obscenely- priced Microtel is located) and enjoyed their side of the beach. I got to talk to an employee from Microtel. Their rates are so high that most of their guests are Chinese and Foreigners. Not a place for Filipinos. All their employees are Filipino though and they pay these loyal people 4,000 a month. The guy said their employer knows that they really need a job and takes advantage of the fact that it was 4000 a month or nothing. 4000 for Microtel would be 1 person’s 1 night’s stay. Like what he said “Kapit sa patalim”. It could just make you cry for your race.

Unlike the other beaches in the Philippines where there’s fishing in the early morning, there’s none of that in Boracay. Locals say the government made them stop fishing “for the beautification” of Boracay. I say that’s crap. Seeing the community gather in the morning is prettier than seeing drunk lying in the sand around their barf or bars cleaning up the mess from the night before.

Overall, the islands was beautiful and full of fun. The sunset shows so many colors you can sit in the sand for hours just watching the sky change color.

We’re going back to Boracay on May. With a different set of friends this time.

I am glad that I am no longer a Boracay Virgin. It sucks to be a tourist in my own country.